Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
A Very Merry Falling Forward Christmas; A Christmas Wishes Toys 4 Tots entry
Title: A Very Merry Falling Forward Christmas
Author Penname: KaitieBatie
Rating: K+
Summary: When the crew gets together for a Christmas celebration, something big happens. Something not everyone was expecting.
Warnings: none
(JPOV)
“Chickadee, are you ready yet?” I asked for the six hundredth time.
“Almost ready,” she yelled down the stairway for the hundredth time since she went to get ready.
I sat on the arm to the love seat and sighed. Bella and I had moved back to Phoenix a year and a half ago when Charlie told us that Renee had left their home to us. The move was not as easy as we thought it would be and took longer than anticipated since Bella had to put in for a transfer from the Columbus office where she was working to the Phoenix office. Today we’re getting ready to celebrate another first Christmas, this time in her childhood home. A smile grows on my face as I remember our very first Christmas together.
After the football game was a success, our parents decided they needed to force us to more school events, which is how we ended up dressed to the nines and in the school gym trying not to send Bella to the hospital. My jaw almost fell to the floor when she came out to meet me when I picked her up. Her long, lightly tanned legs looked even longer in the red mini dress and sliver heels. I waited, trying to keep my face from giving away my surprise gift for her, while she walked carefully down the stairs. When she reached me, after what felt like forever, I flashed her my signature smile and pulled the dozen roses from behind my back.
“You see these roses? You will be with me, always in my heart and mind as long as one rose remains.” I said, placing a kiss on her cheek before handing her the roses.
Her face lit up with a smile I knew would only lead to trouble. Bella turned toward the stairs, placing the flowers down before picking up a neatly wrapped box. “This is for you…I think your mom might find it funnier than you will.”
I ripped through the wrapping paper, discarding it everywhere before opening the box. My mouth fell open as I stared at the object that sat inside. “What is it…?” I asked, eyeing the object warily.
“It’s a new alarm clock. Your mom helped me pick it out since your other one is epically fail at getting you out of bed.” Bella teased.
I laughed, shaking my head. “Silly girl, I refused to get out of bed because if I stayed there long enough you would always come and get me. I prefer to wake up to you over any alarm clock the world could create.”
I was pulled out of my memory when Bella finally made her way down the stairs, with something hidden behind her back. I met her at the bottom of the stairs, my curiosity getting the better of me.
“What’cha hiding there Chickadee?” I asked, trying to reach behind her.
Bella turned and slid by me, still keeping the mystery object hidden behind her. “Now don’t you go peaking Mr. Whitlock, it’s a Christmas present that you’ll just have to wait until later to unwrap. I thought you wanted to get going anyway Romeo, you were awfully impatient until I came downstairs.”
“Fine, I will let you have your secret for now.” I took her hand and led her to the car.
We drove out to Tim Mitchell’s Christmas Trees, braving the holiday traffic since we both preferred to wait until the last minute for a tree. Bella thinks it smells better if you get it right before Christmas and I’m just lazy enough to wait until I absolutely have to get the tree.
When we arrived we wandered through the rows and rows of trees, not really finding anything, but enjoying the time together outside of the house. We passed a few who looked like the older relatives to Charlie Brown’s Christmas tree and laughed as the sight brought back memories of several Christmases during college. I was surprised when Bella brought up the worst Christmas we’ve spent together, junior year of college.
“I don’t understand why you continue to see him,’ I sighed as I sat next to her shaking form on the cold and unforgiving bathroom floor.
“Because he loves me and I think it may be the real thing. I just have to compromise with him a little more than I have been, that’s all.” Bella replied, sniffling and whipping the tears away as fast as they fell.
“Oh honey, trust me. He doesn’t want to compromise with you. Think about it, he gets to hang out with whoever he wants whenever he wants, while you are expected to sit in his dorm room and have food ready for when he gets back, if he ever comes back. Alice misses you, as do Edward and I.” I said as I slid her off the floor and into my lap.
“What am I supposed to do? It’s pretty obvious you don’t like me like that anymore and I can’t watch Edward and Alice make goo goo eyes at each other without missing what we had. Laurent shows me he loves me and spends time with me.” She held up her finger to keep me from interrupting. “I know it may not be what everyone else thinks I need but at least I’m getting what I think I need.”
“Chickadee, I still like you like that. I miss you every night and wish I could hold you when your stressed or feeling down, but when you walked away from me after that argument and then started bringing Laurent around, I thought that was your indirect cue that we were done.” I paused for a minute and a brilliant idea came to me.
I picked her up and carried her out of that asshole’s room, not caring about her protests that she could walk or the stares we got from the other residents of the dorm. When I reached the common room, I put her down and then pointed above us, where someone had hung mistletoe. Her eyes lit up with recognition and then became daring. I leaned in, watching her as I got so close I could taste the peppermint on her breath, closed my eyes and pressed my lips to hers hoping that the kiss conveyed everything I felt for her and how much I had missed her. When she pulled away and wrapped her arms around my neck with a sigh, I knew she felt the same way and I would never let myself lose her again.
I returned to the present when Bella entwined her fingers with mine before pointing towards the rope lights the owner had strung across the lot. I smiled as I chastely pressed a sweet kiss to her plump lips. Things have definitely improved since that fateful Christmas. We found the tallest and plumpest tree and carefully loaded it into the bed of my 2011 F-150. When we got home Alice and Edward were waiting to help decorate the tree, their two year old twins wobbling their way through the front year as they explored the new surroundings.
“Bella!” Alice exclaimed as she ran the three feet that separated the two of them.
Edward and I shook our heads as we got the tree inside, tripping over our six year old Newfoundland, Muddles. Once the tree was in its stand and where Bella wanted it, the second part taking much longer than the first since Bella didn’t actually know where she wanted the tree, Bella brought the ornaments and lights out from the hall closet and we began to christmasify the tree. While Edward and I adjusted the top so the angel could sit peacefully without hitting the ceiling, Bella and Alice began placing the presents underneath and it didn’t escape my notice when Alice and Bella exchanged a meaningful look when she picked up the box she had brought down earlier. When the decorating was done and the twins were corralled for nap time we decided to open one gift since Christmas was only a few days away and Edward and Alice would be at his parents for the holiday. We always opened presents in alphabetical order, it made things so much easier since Bella and Alice were prone to argue over who got to open what first, so Alice picked up a thin box addressed to her from Bella and I. We knew she was having a hard time adjusting to working from home instead of the studio so we bought her a tool to help her out a little. Alice slid the pale pink and green ribbon off the plain white box and her eyes lit up like a little kid in the candy store when she saw what was inside.
“You guys, I can’t accept this.” She said, starting to hand it back to Bella.
“Mary Alice Brandon Cullen, you will accept this and you will make the most of it. I know you miss being able to work in your office and how much you despise drawing outfits by hand so I loaded the iPad© with ApparelMagic® and set it up so that you can email the designs directly to Kenley. Well, I didn’t set that up; I had a little help from Emmett the IT guy at work.” Bella said pushing the box back into Alice’s tiny lap.
Bella went next picking up the box I had put under the tree for her. I tried to hide the nervousness that arrived when she chose that one. I knew she wanted to collect first edition books, but I also knew that no matter how nice the gesture, she was going to freak out when she looked up the price later. Charlie helped me out and I had been planning this since she mentioned the idea a year ago, but she wasn’t one to enjoy having money spent on her. My breath caught in my throat when the lid slipped gently from between her fingers and onto the floor, hoping I wasn’t about to have my nuts handed to me for the amount of money I spent trying to get this.
“Jasper, do you know what this book is worth?” She exclaimed as she ran her fingers over the gilt bands that decorated the cover before opening it and gasping. “Jasper I swear if Edward and Alice weren’t here right now…your body would be hidden somewhere where it would never be found!”
“I take it you like it. Your father and I did some research and a little finagling to get it here for Christmas but the reaction was worth the money.” I said.
“Jasper, you found me a signed first edition of Gone with the Wind. I’m not sure I want to ask how much this cost.” She said, eyeing me with suspicion.
“Then don’t ask Chickadee.” I said shaking my head. “Edward it’s you turn man.”
Edward closed his eyes and picked up a gift, Bella’s breath caught in her throat when he picked up that mysterious box from earlier. Edward looked at the tag before handing it to me with a smirk.
“I think I’m going to pass dude. I have everything I could ever want right here in this room. Why don’t you open that one though?” He said wrapping his arms around Alice’s shoulders.
I looked at the box, smiling at the messy wrapping job and remembering how Bella had talked me into wrapping everyone’s gifts since every time she tried there was always part of it showing. I pulled at the small piece of tape, taking my time and enjoying the look of anticipation on Bella’s face. Behind the simple snowflake wrapping was a plain white box, which I’m sure she had borrowed from one of her many pieces of jewelry. I couldn’t control my curiosity anymore and pulled the lid off the box, flinging it in any direction, not really caring where it went. My jaw hit the floor when my brain processed what I was seeing in front of me. Nestled in that unassuming box was an even smaller stick with the word pregnant lit up on one end.
“Is this for real?” I asked, amazement coloring my voice.
“Yeah, you’re going to be a father.” Bella hesitated.
I got off my seat on the couch and picked her up, spinning us around and soaking in the sound of her laughter.
“Merry Christmas Romeo.” Bella whispered to me as I put her feet back on the floor.
Author Penname: KaitieBatie
Rating: K+
Summary: When the crew gets together for a Christmas celebration, something big happens. Something not everyone was expecting.
Warnings: none
(JPOV)
“Chickadee, are you ready yet?” I asked for the six hundredth time.
“Almost ready,” she yelled down the stairway for the hundredth time since she went to get ready.
I sat on the arm to the love seat and sighed. Bella and I had moved back to Phoenix a year and a half ago when Charlie told us that Renee had left their home to us. The move was not as easy as we thought it would be and took longer than anticipated since Bella had to put in for a transfer from the Columbus office where she was working to the Phoenix office. Today we’re getting ready to celebrate another first Christmas, this time in her childhood home. A smile grows on my face as I remember our very first Christmas together.
After the football game was a success, our parents decided they needed to force us to more school events, which is how we ended up dressed to the nines and in the school gym trying not to send Bella to the hospital. My jaw almost fell to the floor when she came out to meet me when I picked her up. Her long, lightly tanned legs looked even longer in the red mini dress and sliver heels. I waited, trying to keep my face from giving away my surprise gift for her, while she walked carefully down the stairs. When she reached me, after what felt like forever, I flashed her my signature smile and pulled the dozen roses from behind my back.
“You see these roses? You will be with me, always in my heart and mind as long as one rose remains.” I said, placing a kiss on her cheek before handing her the roses.
Her face lit up with a smile I knew would only lead to trouble. Bella turned toward the stairs, placing the flowers down before picking up a neatly wrapped box. “This is for you…I think your mom might find it funnier than you will.”
I ripped through the wrapping paper, discarding it everywhere before opening the box. My mouth fell open as I stared at the object that sat inside. “What is it…?” I asked, eyeing the object warily.
“It’s a new alarm clock. Your mom helped me pick it out since your other one is epically fail at getting you out of bed.” Bella teased.
I laughed, shaking my head. “Silly girl, I refused to get out of bed because if I stayed there long enough you would always come and get me. I prefer to wake up to you over any alarm clock the world could create.”
I was pulled out of my memory when Bella finally made her way down the stairs, with something hidden behind her back. I met her at the bottom of the stairs, my curiosity getting the better of me.
“What’cha hiding there Chickadee?” I asked, trying to reach behind her.
Bella turned and slid by me, still keeping the mystery object hidden behind her. “Now don’t you go peaking Mr. Whitlock, it’s a Christmas present that you’ll just have to wait until later to unwrap. I thought you wanted to get going anyway Romeo, you were awfully impatient until I came downstairs.”
“Fine, I will let you have your secret for now.” I took her hand and led her to the car.
We drove out to Tim Mitchell’s Christmas Trees, braving the holiday traffic since we both preferred to wait until the last minute for a tree. Bella thinks it smells better if you get it right before Christmas and I’m just lazy enough to wait until I absolutely have to get the tree.
When we arrived we wandered through the rows and rows of trees, not really finding anything, but enjoying the time together outside of the house. We passed a few who looked like the older relatives to Charlie Brown’s Christmas tree and laughed as the sight brought back memories of several Christmases during college. I was surprised when Bella brought up the worst Christmas we’ve spent together, junior year of college.
“I don’t understand why you continue to see him,’ I sighed as I sat next to her shaking form on the cold and unforgiving bathroom floor.
“Because he loves me and I think it may be the real thing. I just have to compromise with him a little more than I have been, that’s all.” Bella replied, sniffling and whipping the tears away as fast as they fell.
“Oh honey, trust me. He doesn’t want to compromise with you. Think about it, he gets to hang out with whoever he wants whenever he wants, while you are expected to sit in his dorm room and have food ready for when he gets back, if he ever comes back. Alice misses you, as do Edward and I.” I said as I slid her off the floor and into my lap.
“What am I supposed to do? It’s pretty obvious you don’t like me like that anymore and I can’t watch Edward and Alice make goo goo eyes at each other without missing what we had. Laurent shows me he loves me and spends time with me.” She held up her finger to keep me from interrupting. “I know it may not be what everyone else thinks I need but at least I’m getting what I think I need.”
“Chickadee, I still like you like that. I miss you every night and wish I could hold you when your stressed or feeling down, but when you walked away from me after that argument and then started bringing Laurent around, I thought that was your indirect cue that we were done.” I paused for a minute and a brilliant idea came to me.
I picked her up and carried her out of that asshole’s room, not caring about her protests that she could walk or the stares we got from the other residents of the dorm. When I reached the common room, I put her down and then pointed above us, where someone had hung mistletoe. Her eyes lit up with recognition and then became daring. I leaned in, watching her as I got so close I could taste the peppermint on her breath, closed my eyes and pressed my lips to hers hoping that the kiss conveyed everything I felt for her and how much I had missed her. When she pulled away and wrapped her arms around my neck with a sigh, I knew she felt the same way and I would never let myself lose her again.
I returned to the present when Bella entwined her fingers with mine before pointing towards the rope lights the owner had strung across the lot. I smiled as I chastely pressed a sweet kiss to her plump lips. Things have definitely improved since that fateful Christmas. We found the tallest and plumpest tree and carefully loaded it into the bed of my 2011 F-150. When we got home Alice and Edward were waiting to help decorate the tree, their two year old twins wobbling their way through the front year as they explored the new surroundings.
“Bella!” Alice exclaimed as she ran the three feet that separated the two of them.
Edward and I shook our heads as we got the tree inside, tripping over our six year old Newfoundland, Muddles. Once the tree was in its stand and where Bella wanted it, the second part taking much longer than the first since Bella didn’t actually know where she wanted the tree, Bella brought the ornaments and lights out from the hall closet and we began to christmasify the tree. While Edward and I adjusted the top so the angel could sit peacefully without hitting the ceiling, Bella and Alice began placing the presents underneath and it didn’t escape my notice when Alice and Bella exchanged a meaningful look when she picked up the box she had brought down earlier. When the decorating was done and the twins were corralled for nap time we decided to open one gift since Christmas was only a few days away and Edward and Alice would be at his parents for the holiday. We always opened presents in alphabetical order, it made things so much easier since Bella and Alice were prone to argue over who got to open what first, so Alice picked up a thin box addressed to her from Bella and I. We knew she was having a hard time adjusting to working from home instead of the studio so we bought her a tool to help her out a little. Alice slid the pale pink and green ribbon off the plain white box and her eyes lit up like a little kid in the candy store when she saw what was inside.
“You guys, I can’t accept this.” She said, starting to hand it back to Bella.
“Mary Alice Brandon Cullen, you will accept this and you will make the most of it. I know you miss being able to work in your office and how much you despise drawing outfits by hand so I loaded the iPad© with ApparelMagic® and set it up so that you can email the designs directly to Kenley. Well, I didn’t set that up; I had a little help from Emmett the IT guy at work.” Bella said pushing the box back into Alice’s tiny lap.
Bella went next picking up the box I had put under the tree for her. I tried to hide the nervousness that arrived when she chose that one. I knew she wanted to collect first edition books, but I also knew that no matter how nice the gesture, she was going to freak out when she looked up the price later. Charlie helped me out and I had been planning this since she mentioned the idea a year ago, but she wasn’t one to enjoy having money spent on her. My breath caught in my throat when the lid slipped gently from between her fingers and onto the floor, hoping I wasn’t about to have my nuts handed to me for the amount of money I spent trying to get this.
“Jasper, do you know what this book is worth?” She exclaimed as she ran her fingers over the gilt bands that decorated the cover before opening it and gasping. “Jasper I swear if Edward and Alice weren’t here right now…your body would be hidden somewhere where it would never be found!”
“I take it you like it. Your father and I did some research and a little finagling to get it here for Christmas but the reaction was worth the money.” I said.
“Jasper, you found me a signed first edition of Gone with the Wind. I’m not sure I want to ask how much this cost.” She said, eyeing me with suspicion.
“Then don’t ask Chickadee.” I said shaking my head. “Edward it’s you turn man.”
Edward closed his eyes and picked up a gift, Bella’s breath caught in her throat when he picked up that mysterious box from earlier. Edward looked at the tag before handing it to me with a smirk.
“I think I’m going to pass dude. I have everything I could ever want right here in this room. Why don’t you open that one though?” He said wrapping his arms around Alice’s shoulders.
I looked at the box, smiling at the messy wrapping job and remembering how Bella had talked me into wrapping everyone’s gifts since every time she tried there was always part of it showing. I pulled at the small piece of tape, taking my time and enjoying the look of anticipation on Bella’s face. Behind the simple snowflake wrapping was a plain white box, which I’m sure she had borrowed from one of her many pieces of jewelry. I couldn’t control my curiosity anymore and pulled the lid off the box, flinging it in any direction, not really caring where it went. My jaw hit the floor when my brain processed what I was seeing in front of me. Nestled in that unassuming box was an even smaller stick with the word pregnant lit up on one end.
“Is this for real?” I asked, amazement coloring my voice.
“Yeah, you’re going to be a father.” Bella hesitated.
I got off my seat on the couch and picked her up, spinning us around and soaking in the sound of her laughter.
“Merry Christmas Romeo.” Bella whispered to me as I put her feet back on the floor.
Thursday, December 15, 2011
Christmas Wishes Compilation
I am honored to say that I have donated to the amazing cause of Christmas Wishes, which benefits Toys for Tots. We have 39 authors participating this year and with the wonderfully generous hearts of our readers and family members we have raised $425. Donations are going to be accepted until 11:59 EST on Christmas Eve with delivery starting shortly after.
For more information about the compilation and how to donate, please head over to http://christmaswishescompilation.blogspot.com/. I know money is tight for many of us but I hope everyone will be able to help make Christmas special for children every where this year.
For more information about the compilation and how to donate, please head over to http://christmaswishescompilation.blogspot.com/. I know money is tight for many of us but I hope everyone will be able to help make Christmas special for children every where this year.
Saturday, September 17, 2011
Jasper's Tattoo design
So i have been struggling with finding an image that fit the description I gave of Jasper's tattoo in Between Love and Honor and while I was writing with a wonderful group of ladies I may have mentioned this. MrShyRockstar offered to see what she could come up with and tweeted me these ideas, after a little clarification on my part because I suck at explaining things apparently.
and
left side is the hip, right side is the shoulder...took me a second to figure that out when I looked at it.
She then offered to have her friend, Jericca Gardner, see what she could come up with and this is what I was sent.
Both these girls are amazing and the designs are like they read my mind and drew it. I can't seem to decide which fits my initial idea better, so I was hoping you wonderful readers would help. Comment and tell me which design you think fits better and why :) Hope to see everyone at the next update!
and
She then offered to have her friend, Jericca Gardner, see what she could come up with and this is what I was sent.
Both these girls are amazing and the designs are like they read my mind and drew it. I can't seem to decide which fits my initial idea better, so I was hoping you wonderful readers would help. Comment and tell me which design you think fits better and why :) Hope to see everyone at the next update!
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Are You Going to Kiss Me or Not? An Entry for The Love, Actually Contest
Summary: When life gets in the way of developing a relationship with someone special how do you overcome fear of rejection to seize every moment before it might be too late? An entry for the Love, Actually O/S contest.
*~Present Day~*
I slipped the pale pink dress slowly over my white legs, briefly making a mental note to find a way to look less dead. I smiled, remembering back to the day when I first wore this dress, while I slid my feet into the baby pink peep toe heels and fastened the simple gold chain around my neck, adjusting the cross pendant.
There was a soft knock on my door, and my little sister, Alice, walked into my room. Alice was little in every sense of the word and in every way, except personality. She stood at four foot eleven inches and had her mousy brown hair tucked up on top of her head in soft curls and messy braids. Her blue-grey eyes danced with a mixture of excitement and mischief as she approached.
"Alice, I swear, if you are here to cause trouble, you are definitely in the wrong room," I said as I added the finishing touches to my reddish-brown hair.
"Awe, Bells, when have I ever caused trouble for you?" she asked, sounding hurt until I raised an eyebrow, and we both fell into a fit of giggles.
When the fit subsided, Alice took my hand, dragging me through the door and down the stairs to where my party was taking place.
*~2002~*
I walked into the large building, made of white siding and red bricks, with Alice, Emmett, Sue and Charlie after being dragged out of bed at some ungodly hour. My hands nervously fidgeted with the hem of the sweater I wore over the pale flowered Sax 5th avenue dress I had picked out before going to stay with Renee for the weekend. We found a pew a few rows from the front and sat down, waiting for the service to start.
I looked around, taking in the sights and sounds of the building. The pews were a dark brown wood with a red seat cushion. The wood was smooth and cool as I ran my hands across it. Somewhere in the large sanctuary, heels clicked on the light oak floor, stopping as they encountered the plush red carpet that ran down around the pews. I looked toward the front, where the choir was taking their seats, startled as a family sat in front of us suddenly. A boy about my age, maybe a year older than I was, caught my attention. His sandy blond hair was cut short and stood in disarray, making me wonder if he had just rolled out of bed.
As the service progressed, the children in the congregation were asked to come down to go to Sunday school, and with some prodding from Charlie and Sue, the three of us followed the sandy blond and the other children out of the sanctuary and upstairs. I looked around, trying to figure out where I was supposed to go, and jumped slightly when I felt a reassuring hand on my shoulder.
"Hi, I'm Jasper," he said, holding out his other hand to me. "You look a little lost, do you need help finding your classroom?" he asked, his honey voice soothing any remaining nerves I had.
I murmured my thanks and followed him to a room down the hall marked seventh through ninth grade. In that hour, I learned more about myself from a stranger than I had in the twelve years I had been around. He showed me I could be impatient and confusing but also trusting and energetic when it came to defending something I believed in.
*~2004~*
"I don't want to, and I don't need help; I can figure it out on my own," I said, putting my plate down roughly on the table as my family and I sat down to eat at the weekly community supper.
"Isabella, you obviously can't figure it out yourself; you are failing pre-calculus," Sue said as she sat down next to Charlie.
I huffed and shoved a fork full of salad in my mouth, ignoring the fact that they were right. Jasper and his family walked in as Sue was continuing her rant about my inability to follow simple steps, causing me to tune everything out and smile.
"Isabella!" Charlie said, catching my attention again.
"Wha…" I answered still keeping my eyes on Jasper as he moved around the room.
"Why don't you go ask Jasper for help? He's a smart boy, and I'm sure he has passed the class already," Charlie suggested as soon as I took a sip from my drink, causing me to spit it across the table.
"You okay there, kiddo?" Charlie asked, smiling.
"Totally, I think I just found a bone in my water, though," I said coughing as the rest of the family laughed.
The rest of the meal was filled with laughter, and soon it was time to clean up and head back to the pile of homework we'd left on the living room floor. As we were walking out, my parents couldn't leave well enough alone and made a point to mention to Jasper as we were leaving that I was having trouble in math. I did the normal teenage thing- waving as I put my head down and kept walking to the car ahead of the rest of them.
The next morning, I took my math books out and found a quiet corner of the library so I could attempt to finish the homework I was assigned. I had worked my way through half a problem when a Calculus textbook was dropped in front of me. I looked up before rolling my eyes and looking back down at the problem as I threw my pencil.
"Hey, midget, how's it going?" Jasper asked as he sat down across from me.
"How does it look like it's going?" I said, glaring at him playfully before slamming my head down on the book.
"Well, right now I'd say you just successfully almost gave yourself a concussion and haven't finished a problem," he said as he placed my pencil back on the table.
I rolled my eyes and went back to staring at the problem in front of me, picking up the pencil and dropping it again when I couldn't figure out where to go next.
"Do you need help?" Jasper asked, sliding the book around so he could see the problem.
"If you don't mind," I said, dropping my line of sight from his eyes to the table in front of him.
"Hey," he said as he gently lifted my chin, "it's okay to ask for help when you need it."
Jasper patiently walked me through the rest of the assignment before classes started and made plans to meet later that night to go over anything new learned in class.
*~2006~*
It was the Friday before Prom, and the school was buzzing with excitement, and Jasper and I had rolled our eyes at the whole idea of it. As the day wore on, I started to understand the excitement, and Angela only fueled the growing anticipation when she began discussing dresses with me at lunch. As I walked out to the courtyard and the parking lot at the end of the day, I found Jasper sitting on a low retaining wall in his bright yellow track jacket.
Walking as quietly as I could, I placed my hands over his eyes. "Guess who."
I could feel his smile spread across his face as he pulled my hands down. "Hi, midget."
I moved to sit next to him, sighing. "How'd you know it was me?"
"After all this time, it isn't hard for me to identify you. You aren't the most graceful or quiet person I've had the pleasure of meeting," he said with a laugh.
"That's not…" I said, pausing mid-sentence as my ex walked over to us.
"Hi, Bella," Tyler said as he sat down next to us.
Jasper and I shared a look as we readjusted the way we were sitting so Tyler was no longer sitting on top of me-Jasper's look telling me to behave and mine asking if I really had to. I could have laughed when we finally settled, there was about two feet between Tyler and I while I was almost sitting in Jasper's lap. Ignoring the look I got from Tyler, I turned to Jasper, determined to get the answer I wanted to the question I was about to ask.
"Hey, Jasper, are you doing anything tomorrow night?"
Jasper looked from Tyler to me before answering, "I don't think so, why?"
"Oh, well I was wondering if you'd be interested in maybe checking out Prom with me. Angela was making it sound like fun when we were talking at lunch today," I said nonchalantly, watching my classmates as they went their separate ways.
"Um, sure if that's something you want to do, I guess I could go along to keep you out of trouble," Jasper said, adding a chuckle as he thought of all the trouble I could get into on my own, most of it including the emergency room no doubt.
Tyler scoffed as he reached for his bag, and I had to say something, there was only so much I could take from him today, and he had already met his quota this morning. "What is the problem Tyler?"
"When I asked you to Prom, you told me it wasn't your thing, but now you're willing to go with him," he said incredulously. "That's okay, I see how it is. I bet you never even wanted to go out with me or really meant it when you said you loved me."
I stood up and pulled my hand back to haul off and smack him like I wanted to and stopped, surprised when I felt resistance. I turned around and pleaded to Jasper with my eyes, hoping he'd understand how badly I needed to do this. He took a step closer, seeing I was no longer feeling decidedly violent and wrapped his arms around my waist, over my own arms.
He leaned forward, placing his jaw on my shoulder and whispered, "He's not worth it, midget. Come on, let's go, I'm sure Esme's waiting for us at the church."
With one last anger filled look at Tyler, I picked up my backpack and followed after Jasper as he made his way to the metallic blue 1997 Chevrolet Camaro his parents had bought him as a gift for doing so well on his driver's test and keeping his grades up during track and cross country. I sank into the passenger's seat and sighed, turning to lean against the door when Jasper had started out of the parking lot.
"Why didn't you let me hit him? I mean, really, after the scene he caused this morning and all the crap he has put me through…" I sighed. "I just want to hit him once, I promise."
Jasper shook his head, placing his hand on my knee. "I was not about to let you punch him in front of the principle. I'm pretty sure they have a rule about not being able to go to Prom if you're suspended from school. I'll let you hit him this weekend if we see him, okay? Or I may just do it myself."
I smiled, relaxing into the door as Jasper drove us from the school to the church where we were meeting the rest of the youth group to help Esme set up for the community supper before my weekly tutoring session. Jasper drove me home after we were finished, promising to pick me up at two the next afternoon to take me out to do something fun before heading to Prom. I pulled a light green halter dress out of the closet Alice and I shared before climbing into bed.
When Jasper picked me up, he was dressed in a pair of old cut off shorts and an old track competition tee. I put my dress in the back seat, grateful I hadn't changed out of my favorite pair of cut off daisy-dukes and favorite well-washed tee.
I turned to him as I sat in the passenger seat, practically buzzing with excitement. "So, are you going to tell me where we're going?" I asked, sounding like a five-year-old that couldn't figure out their surprise.
"No, silly, that would ruin the surprise," he said chuckling at my impatience.
I pouted the entire ride, still trying to get him to give me a clue but nothing I tried seemed to work. I knew we were close to our destination when Jasper pulled off to the side of the road and pulled a blindfold out of the glove compartment. I looked at him incredulously.
"Do you trust me?" he asked, holding one had out while the other continued to hold the blindfold.
"Oh, now you're quoting classic Disney movies to me?" I chuckled, taking the blindfold and tying it around my head. "You are not going to make me fall or walk into anything, right?" I asked as he pulled back on to the road.
"I promise, midget. You will not fall or walk into anything tonight," he said as he took my hand in his, resting them on the center console.
When he took the blindfold off, we were at Mel's Funway Park, and he had paid for a round of mini golf for the two of us. He beat me horribly, like, not even close to being able to catch him. It was a lot of fun, and we made plans to get together before finals the following weekend to do it again. When we had returned everything and paid for our ice cream, he drove us to the banquet hall where prom was being held. The celling was covered in white gauze and silver stars while the tables were covered in black and white linens and gold candles. I looked around in amazement while Jasper and I waited for the rest of our friends to arrive. I leaned back into his chest when his arms wrapped around my waist, enjoying the comfort and peace he provided.
"Are you enjoying yourself?" he asked, tightening his grip as I lost my balance briefly.
"I am, thank you for coming with me and for the mini golf earlier. I'm glad I asked you and didn't agree to go with Tyler just because I felt I had to," I said, resting my head on his chest.
~*Present Day*~
I entered the living room where our friends and family had gathered, all awaiting Jasper's return. They had been my rock and sanity, keeping me together while he was across the country. I didn't know when he made the decision, but one day, ten months ago, he came home and told me he had enlisted for the Marines and was leaving for Boot Camp. I cried and asked him to stay but couldn't convince either of us that I wanted him to stay for more than my own selfish need to have him close. I stood by his decision, because, honestly, what else could I have done?, I had been in love with him for years and couldn't stand to see our friendship end because we couldn't agree to disagree about one point. I wrote to him faithfully every week he was away and waited with baited breath for his responses.
When he told me he'd be home for a couple of weeks, I immediately enlisted Alice's help to plan a welcome home party he wouldn't forget. As I stood in the doorway looking at everyone who had shown up to support the courageous man we had all come to love in our own way, I couldn't help but get excited and start counting the seconds until he came through the front door. I must have been lost in my own thoughts because the next thing I knew, a pair of strong arms had wrapped around my waist, and I was spinning through the air.
When my feet connected with the ground again, I spun around, losing my balance in the process and threw my arms around Jasper's neck. "Welcome home!" I exclaimed, tightening my grip for effect.
"Thank you, midget." He chuckled. "If I had known this was the welcome home I was going to get, I would have left before."
"Don't ever do that to me again, Jasper Whitlock," I said, my face reflecting how serious I was.
"As you wish," he replied, placing a tender kiss on my forehead.
My face light up as a smile spread across my face, and I came back to the reality where we weren't the only two in the room. I gave him another tight hug before moving away so other people could say hello and so I could pretend I was good at playing hostess. The party winded down after several hours spent catching up with friends we hadn't seen since high school and playing games, some involving shots of the adult variety. When it was quiet again and I could enjoy the peacefulness that came with the location of my parents' house, Jasper took my hand and led me through the upstairs and on to the roof through my childhood bedroom window.
We sat there, looking at the stars and talking about everything we had been up to since he was home last in December and where we saw ourselves in five years, enjoying the smell of fresh cut grass, lilacs and each others company. I leaned into his shoulder and looked up at him, taking in his silhouette against the moon, relishing in the way we could communicate without saying anything.
"I love you," I whispered, hoping that he heard me and at the same time hoping he didn't.
"I love you, too," Jasper whispered as he pulled me into his lap and stared into my eyes, keeping my attention effortlessly.
I smiled and leaned my forehead against his. "Are you going to kiss me or not?"
Jasper tilted his head forward painfully slowly until our lips just barely brushed against each other. I closed my eyes, deciding to rely on my sense of touch, smell and sound to paint this picture on the canvas of my memory, and waited for the moment I had dreamed about to actually happen. When our lips connected, it was like everything finally fell into place and all was right in the world. Slowly opening my eyes, I looked at Jasper and couldn't help the smile that spread across my face as I sarcastically said, "Well it took you long enough to decipher the clues I left for you."
Jasper laughed and pulled me closer to him as we continued to sit there and appreciate everything we had in life and how we got to where we were.
*~Present Day~*
I slipped the pale pink dress slowly over my white legs, briefly making a mental note to find a way to look less dead. I smiled, remembering back to the day when I first wore this dress, while I slid my feet into the baby pink peep toe heels and fastened the simple gold chain around my neck, adjusting the cross pendant.
There was a soft knock on my door, and my little sister, Alice, walked into my room. Alice was little in every sense of the word and in every way, except personality. She stood at four foot eleven inches and had her mousy brown hair tucked up on top of her head in soft curls and messy braids. Her blue-grey eyes danced with a mixture of excitement and mischief as she approached.
"Alice, I swear, if you are here to cause trouble, you are definitely in the wrong room," I said as I added the finishing touches to my reddish-brown hair.
"Awe, Bells, when have I ever caused trouble for you?" she asked, sounding hurt until I raised an eyebrow, and we both fell into a fit of giggles.
When the fit subsided, Alice took my hand, dragging me through the door and down the stairs to where my party was taking place.
*~2002~*
I walked into the large building, made of white siding and red bricks, with Alice, Emmett, Sue and Charlie after being dragged out of bed at some ungodly hour. My hands nervously fidgeted with the hem of the sweater I wore over the pale flowered Sax 5th avenue dress I had picked out before going to stay with Renee for the weekend. We found a pew a few rows from the front and sat down, waiting for the service to start.
I looked around, taking in the sights and sounds of the building. The pews were a dark brown wood with a red seat cushion. The wood was smooth and cool as I ran my hands across it. Somewhere in the large sanctuary, heels clicked on the light oak floor, stopping as they encountered the plush red carpet that ran down around the pews. I looked toward the front, where the choir was taking their seats, startled as a family sat in front of us suddenly. A boy about my age, maybe a year older than I was, caught my attention. His sandy blond hair was cut short and stood in disarray, making me wonder if he had just rolled out of bed.
As the service progressed, the children in the congregation were asked to come down to go to Sunday school, and with some prodding from Charlie and Sue, the three of us followed the sandy blond and the other children out of the sanctuary and upstairs. I looked around, trying to figure out where I was supposed to go, and jumped slightly when I felt a reassuring hand on my shoulder.
"Hi, I'm Jasper," he said, holding out his other hand to me. "You look a little lost, do you need help finding your classroom?" he asked, his honey voice soothing any remaining nerves I had.
I murmured my thanks and followed him to a room down the hall marked seventh through ninth grade. In that hour, I learned more about myself from a stranger than I had in the twelve years I had been around. He showed me I could be impatient and confusing but also trusting and energetic when it came to defending something I believed in.
*~2004~*
"I don't want to, and I don't need help; I can figure it out on my own," I said, putting my plate down roughly on the table as my family and I sat down to eat at the weekly community supper.
"Isabella, you obviously can't figure it out yourself; you are failing pre-calculus," Sue said as she sat down next to Charlie.
I huffed and shoved a fork full of salad in my mouth, ignoring the fact that they were right. Jasper and his family walked in as Sue was continuing her rant about my inability to follow simple steps, causing me to tune everything out and smile.
"Isabella!" Charlie said, catching my attention again.
"Wha…" I answered still keeping my eyes on Jasper as he moved around the room.
"Why don't you go ask Jasper for help? He's a smart boy, and I'm sure he has passed the class already," Charlie suggested as soon as I took a sip from my drink, causing me to spit it across the table.
"You okay there, kiddo?" Charlie asked, smiling.
"Totally, I think I just found a bone in my water, though," I said coughing as the rest of the family laughed.
The rest of the meal was filled with laughter, and soon it was time to clean up and head back to the pile of homework we'd left on the living room floor. As we were walking out, my parents couldn't leave well enough alone and made a point to mention to Jasper as we were leaving that I was having trouble in math. I did the normal teenage thing- waving as I put my head down and kept walking to the car ahead of the rest of them.
The next morning, I took my math books out and found a quiet corner of the library so I could attempt to finish the homework I was assigned. I had worked my way through half a problem when a Calculus textbook was dropped in front of me. I looked up before rolling my eyes and looking back down at the problem as I threw my pencil.
"Hey, midget, how's it going?" Jasper asked as he sat down across from me.
"How does it look like it's going?" I said, glaring at him playfully before slamming my head down on the book.
"Well, right now I'd say you just successfully almost gave yourself a concussion and haven't finished a problem," he said as he placed my pencil back on the table.
I rolled my eyes and went back to staring at the problem in front of me, picking up the pencil and dropping it again when I couldn't figure out where to go next.
"Do you need help?" Jasper asked, sliding the book around so he could see the problem.
"If you don't mind," I said, dropping my line of sight from his eyes to the table in front of him.
"Hey," he said as he gently lifted my chin, "it's okay to ask for help when you need it."
Jasper patiently walked me through the rest of the assignment before classes started and made plans to meet later that night to go over anything new learned in class.
*~2006~*
It was the Friday before Prom, and the school was buzzing with excitement, and Jasper and I had rolled our eyes at the whole idea of it. As the day wore on, I started to understand the excitement, and Angela only fueled the growing anticipation when she began discussing dresses with me at lunch. As I walked out to the courtyard and the parking lot at the end of the day, I found Jasper sitting on a low retaining wall in his bright yellow track jacket.
Walking as quietly as I could, I placed my hands over his eyes. "Guess who."
I could feel his smile spread across his face as he pulled my hands down. "Hi, midget."
I moved to sit next to him, sighing. "How'd you know it was me?"
"After all this time, it isn't hard for me to identify you. You aren't the most graceful or quiet person I've had the pleasure of meeting," he said with a laugh.
"That's not…" I said, pausing mid-sentence as my ex walked over to us.
"Hi, Bella," Tyler said as he sat down next to us.
Jasper and I shared a look as we readjusted the way we were sitting so Tyler was no longer sitting on top of me-Jasper's look telling me to behave and mine asking if I really had to. I could have laughed when we finally settled, there was about two feet between Tyler and I while I was almost sitting in Jasper's lap. Ignoring the look I got from Tyler, I turned to Jasper, determined to get the answer I wanted to the question I was about to ask.
"Hey, Jasper, are you doing anything tomorrow night?"
Jasper looked from Tyler to me before answering, "I don't think so, why?"
"Oh, well I was wondering if you'd be interested in maybe checking out Prom with me. Angela was making it sound like fun when we were talking at lunch today," I said nonchalantly, watching my classmates as they went their separate ways.
"Um, sure if that's something you want to do, I guess I could go along to keep you out of trouble," Jasper said, adding a chuckle as he thought of all the trouble I could get into on my own, most of it including the emergency room no doubt.
Tyler scoffed as he reached for his bag, and I had to say something, there was only so much I could take from him today, and he had already met his quota this morning. "What is the problem Tyler?"
"When I asked you to Prom, you told me it wasn't your thing, but now you're willing to go with him," he said incredulously. "That's okay, I see how it is. I bet you never even wanted to go out with me or really meant it when you said you loved me."
I stood up and pulled my hand back to haul off and smack him like I wanted to and stopped, surprised when I felt resistance. I turned around and pleaded to Jasper with my eyes, hoping he'd understand how badly I needed to do this. He took a step closer, seeing I was no longer feeling decidedly violent and wrapped his arms around my waist, over my own arms.
He leaned forward, placing his jaw on my shoulder and whispered, "He's not worth it, midget. Come on, let's go, I'm sure Esme's waiting for us at the church."
With one last anger filled look at Tyler, I picked up my backpack and followed after Jasper as he made his way to the metallic blue 1997 Chevrolet Camaro his parents had bought him as a gift for doing so well on his driver's test and keeping his grades up during track and cross country. I sank into the passenger's seat and sighed, turning to lean against the door when Jasper had started out of the parking lot.
"Why didn't you let me hit him? I mean, really, after the scene he caused this morning and all the crap he has put me through…" I sighed. "I just want to hit him once, I promise."
Jasper shook his head, placing his hand on my knee. "I was not about to let you punch him in front of the principle. I'm pretty sure they have a rule about not being able to go to Prom if you're suspended from school. I'll let you hit him this weekend if we see him, okay? Or I may just do it myself."
I smiled, relaxing into the door as Jasper drove us from the school to the church where we were meeting the rest of the youth group to help Esme set up for the community supper before my weekly tutoring session. Jasper drove me home after we were finished, promising to pick me up at two the next afternoon to take me out to do something fun before heading to Prom. I pulled a light green halter dress out of the closet Alice and I shared before climbing into bed.
When Jasper picked me up, he was dressed in a pair of old cut off shorts and an old track competition tee. I put my dress in the back seat, grateful I hadn't changed out of my favorite pair of cut off daisy-dukes and favorite well-washed tee.
I turned to him as I sat in the passenger seat, practically buzzing with excitement. "So, are you going to tell me where we're going?" I asked, sounding like a five-year-old that couldn't figure out their surprise.
"No, silly, that would ruin the surprise," he said chuckling at my impatience.
I pouted the entire ride, still trying to get him to give me a clue but nothing I tried seemed to work. I knew we were close to our destination when Jasper pulled off to the side of the road and pulled a blindfold out of the glove compartment. I looked at him incredulously.
"Do you trust me?" he asked, holding one had out while the other continued to hold the blindfold.
"Oh, now you're quoting classic Disney movies to me?" I chuckled, taking the blindfold and tying it around my head. "You are not going to make me fall or walk into anything, right?" I asked as he pulled back on to the road.
"I promise, midget. You will not fall or walk into anything tonight," he said as he took my hand in his, resting them on the center console.
When he took the blindfold off, we were at Mel's Funway Park, and he had paid for a round of mini golf for the two of us. He beat me horribly, like, not even close to being able to catch him. It was a lot of fun, and we made plans to get together before finals the following weekend to do it again. When we had returned everything and paid for our ice cream, he drove us to the banquet hall where prom was being held. The celling was covered in white gauze and silver stars while the tables were covered in black and white linens and gold candles. I looked around in amazement while Jasper and I waited for the rest of our friends to arrive. I leaned back into his chest when his arms wrapped around my waist, enjoying the comfort and peace he provided.
"Are you enjoying yourself?" he asked, tightening his grip as I lost my balance briefly.
"I am, thank you for coming with me and for the mini golf earlier. I'm glad I asked you and didn't agree to go with Tyler just because I felt I had to," I said, resting my head on his chest.
~*Present Day*~
I entered the living room where our friends and family had gathered, all awaiting Jasper's return. They had been my rock and sanity, keeping me together while he was across the country. I didn't know when he made the decision, but one day, ten months ago, he came home and told me he had enlisted for the Marines and was leaving for Boot Camp. I cried and asked him to stay but couldn't convince either of us that I wanted him to stay for more than my own selfish need to have him close. I stood by his decision, because, honestly, what else could I have done?, I had been in love with him for years and couldn't stand to see our friendship end because we couldn't agree to disagree about one point. I wrote to him faithfully every week he was away and waited with baited breath for his responses.
When he told me he'd be home for a couple of weeks, I immediately enlisted Alice's help to plan a welcome home party he wouldn't forget. As I stood in the doorway looking at everyone who had shown up to support the courageous man we had all come to love in our own way, I couldn't help but get excited and start counting the seconds until he came through the front door. I must have been lost in my own thoughts because the next thing I knew, a pair of strong arms had wrapped around my waist, and I was spinning through the air.
When my feet connected with the ground again, I spun around, losing my balance in the process and threw my arms around Jasper's neck. "Welcome home!" I exclaimed, tightening my grip for effect.
"Thank you, midget." He chuckled. "If I had known this was the welcome home I was going to get, I would have left before."
"Don't ever do that to me again, Jasper Whitlock," I said, my face reflecting how serious I was.
"As you wish," he replied, placing a tender kiss on my forehead.
My face light up as a smile spread across my face, and I came back to the reality where we weren't the only two in the room. I gave him another tight hug before moving away so other people could say hello and so I could pretend I was good at playing hostess. The party winded down after several hours spent catching up with friends we hadn't seen since high school and playing games, some involving shots of the adult variety. When it was quiet again and I could enjoy the peacefulness that came with the location of my parents' house, Jasper took my hand and led me through the upstairs and on to the roof through my childhood bedroom window.
We sat there, looking at the stars and talking about everything we had been up to since he was home last in December and where we saw ourselves in five years, enjoying the smell of fresh cut grass, lilacs and each others company. I leaned into his shoulder and looked up at him, taking in his silhouette against the moon, relishing in the way we could communicate without saying anything.
"I love you," I whispered, hoping that he heard me and at the same time hoping he didn't.
"I love you, too," Jasper whispered as he pulled me into his lap and stared into my eyes, keeping my attention effortlessly.
I smiled and leaned my forehead against his. "Are you going to kiss me or not?"
Jasper tilted his head forward painfully slowly until our lips just barely brushed against each other. I closed my eyes, deciding to rely on my sense of touch, smell and sound to paint this picture on the canvas of my memory, and waited for the moment I had dreamed about to actually happen. When our lips connected, it was like everything finally fell into place and all was right in the world. Slowly opening my eyes, I looked at Jasper and couldn't help the smile that spread across my face as I sarcastically said, "Well it took you long enough to decipher the clues I left for you."
Jasper laughed and pulled me closer to him as we continued to sit there and appreciate everything we had in life and how we got to where we were.
Equation for Murder-Suicide
I’m standing here on our lawn, watching as the worms push through the still warm earth. The brutal one hundred degree weather had cooled slightly since the sun went down, but not enough to keep the air from feeling like a heavy down blanket, suffocating anyone stupid enough to stand in it. I suppress my laughter as the worms worked their way through my toes, attacking the ticklish spot underneath my feet. Carefully, I slowly make my way to her window, kneeling quietly so as to not attract the attention of the neighbors, or that of the brunette beauty on the other side of the warped glass window.
“I thought I might be able to get your head right, your heart right, convince you to let him go.” I mumble to myself, as I watch him slide the zipper on your dress slowly down your back.
I watch as he embraces every newly exposed inch of your soft, lightly tanned skin, your silk dress falling, becoming a vibrant red puddle at your feet, contrasting with the dark walnut floor. I can’t believe the ways you are bending, in ways I never thought you could. I can’t believe my ears as the moans filter through the glass, the never ending begging and pleading for more.
“How far will I go to make it feel right? I have to fix this on my own,” I say as I creep closer still to the window.
From my new vantage point, I am close enough to see the way he touched her, his hands gently, reverently running from her feet and across her knees, inside her sweetest spot as he tries to please her. Turning around, I close my eyes tight trying to gain control, but I am no longer capable of control tonight. The image of her with him is seared into my brain as I crawl to the back window; the one I knew would be open since I never took the time to fix it. Sliding effortlessly through the opening, I stand quietly in the living room, “this used to be my home.” I think to myself, as I take in the lack of pictures. It's almost as if she has simply moved on, erasing me from every aspect of her life in the process. I turn the knob to what used to be the office, using only two fingers in order to be slow enough that I can sneak in with the shadows, adding to the darkness and gloom. I had some sick need to see this happening. The clapping of skin on skin assaults my ears as he pushes himself so deep inside her, the sound bouncing off the wooden walled room. In that moment, everything goes blank and the only thing I see is the color red as I walk, calmly, numbly beside the bed.
“Edward,” she says between shaky breaths, confusion coloring her voice.
“I know I’m not allowed to be here. I just had to see how well your new man really fucks you because you have both been fucking me. I’ve planned something you both can do as a pair,” I say, tying the blindfolds tight around his eyes to block his stare. “I don’t want to alarm you, but I figure we can end this in a way that seems easy, quick and painless.”
I turn to face him, placing my pistol to the soft spot on the side of his head, noting briefly the contrast of the silver barrel against his shiny brown curls, slick with sweat. “I’ll get down to business, I choose you first. I’m sure you can feel the gun at your head. So laugh at me one more time, but keep your face turned toward the bed.” I turn my attention to my wife, “Sit there and watch me while I do this, and learn from what I’ve said.” I cock the pistol, pull the trigger, and all I see is red.
I relish in the screaming. "It’s nice to see you scared of your weak and stupid husband who knows you never really cared."
“I’ll leave you with a question, one that I need to hear from you. Was all this worth it, now that you know you only have seconds left to live? Now think about your answer, and lie face down on the bed.” I cock the pistol, pull the trigger, and all I see is red, too impatient to listen to her mumbled and forced answer.
I gently stroke her arm as she lies lifeless on her back, mumbling to myself, “Replace my heart, ‘cause I’m convinced mine broke the day I let us end. I don’t want to live by coping, I’m done with hoping, end.” I place the barrel in my mouth, and all I see is black.
“I thought I might be able to get your head right, your heart right, convince you to let him go.” I mumble to myself, as I watch him slide the zipper on your dress slowly down your back.
I watch as he embraces every newly exposed inch of your soft, lightly tanned skin, your silk dress falling, becoming a vibrant red puddle at your feet, contrasting with the dark walnut floor. I can’t believe the ways you are bending, in ways I never thought you could. I can’t believe my ears as the moans filter through the glass, the never ending begging and pleading for more.
“How far will I go to make it feel right? I have to fix this on my own,” I say as I creep closer still to the window.
From my new vantage point, I am close enough to see the way he touched her, his hands gently, reverently running from her feet and across her knees, inside her sweetest spot as he tries to please her. Turning around, I close my eyes tight trying to gain control, but I am no longer capable of control tonight. The image of her with him is seared into my brain as I crawl to the back window; the one I knew would be open since I never took the time to fix it. Sliding effortlessly through the opening, I stand quietly in the living room, “this used to be my home.” I think to myself, as I take in the lack of pictures. It's almost as if she has simply moved on, erasing me from every aspect of her life in the process. I turn the knob to what used to be the office, using only two fingers in order to be slow enough that I can sneak in with the shadows, adding to the darkness and gloom. I had some sick need to see this happening. The clapping of skin on skin assaults my ears as he pushes himself so deep inside her, the sound bouncing off the wooden walled room. In that moment, everything goes blank and the only thing I see is the color red as I walk, calmly, numbly beside the bed.
“Edward,” she says between shaky breaths, confusion coloring her voice.
“I know I’m not allowed to be here. I just had to see how well your new man really fucks you because you have both been fucking me. I’ve planned something you both can do as a pair,” I say, tying the blindfolds tight around his eyes to block his stare. “I don’t want to alarm you, but I figure we can end this in a way that seems easy, quick and painless.”
I turn to face him, placing my pistol to the soft spot on the side of his head, noting briefly the contrast of the silver barrel against his shiny brown curls, slick with sweat. “I’ll get down to business, I choose you first. I’m sure you can feel the gun at your head. So laugh at me one more time, but keep your face turned toward the bed.” I turn my attention to my wife, “Sit there and watch me while I do this, and learn from what I’ve said.” I cock the pistol, pull the trigger, and all I see is red.
I relish in the screaming. "It’s nice to see you scared of your weak and stupid husband who knows you never really cared."
“I’ll leave you with a question, one that I need to hear from you. Was all this worth it, now that you know you only have seconds left to live? Now think about your answer, and lie face down on the bed.” I cock the pistol, pull the trigger, and all I see is red, too impatient to listen to her mumbled and forced answer.
I gently stroke her arm as she lies lifeless on her back, mumbling to myself, “Replace my heart, ‘cause I’m convinced mine broke the day I let us end. I don’t want to live by coping, I’m done with hoping, end.” I place the barrel in my mouth, and all I see is black.
Chapter 13: Bella POV
I sat on the railing watching again as Jasper’s car drove away, and I was getting pretty fucking sick of watching that car drive away. Storming into the house, I left the door wide open, not caring if I let a whole swarm of mosquitos in. When I reached my destination my plan fell into place, tonight Jasper Whitlock would fall victim to my womanly wiles. My hand reached out for the lace dress my mother got me one year from fashion week and I briefly admired the short feather skirt. I grabbed my coral belt and matching patent leather heels to finish off the outfit before quietly making my way to Daddy’s office to find Jasper’s address.
I lied again. I’m getting really good at doing that; I guess the theater class the school had me take was good for something. Daddy asked where I was going, dressed like I was and at such a late hour. I told him Angela found a new hang out and wanted me to check it out with her. He let me go but set a curfew, and he knew I hated those. I slowly pulled into the parking lot behind a tall brick building next to the car that haunted my day dreams, so many possibilities. I pulled myself out of the daydream and began the journey to his apartment.
I stood outside of the apartment taking in the imperfections of the large 698 on the door, listening to the quiet noises as they filtered through the wood. I laughed quietly as light sound of snoring battled with the attempted quiet from the running water. I pulled my hand back and let it lightly fall against the smooth door, hoping whoever was awake didn’t hear it. I was about to turn away when the door opened and I was soundlessly invited in.
The scene before me unfolded as I was invited into the small and undecorated apartment by the blonde who had bravely faced me after my not so lady-like behavior earlier. It was obvious Jasper was dead to the world, while he slept, since he barely registered the door closing as his sister walked away too soon to attend to the bacon and sausage sizzling in the cast iron skillet on the stove. I took in more of the scene and picked up a blue and white checkered bowl before mixing in what appeared to be the rest of the ingredients for cinnamon apple pancakes. Jasper’s sister walked over after making sure we hadn’t woken him and lightly placed a well-manicured hand in my shoulder.
“I didn’t have a chance to introduce myself earlier, I’m Rosalie Hale.” She said, extending a hand out to me.
I looked at her hand and back to the bowl before putting the bowl down and shaking her hand quickly. “I’m Isabella Swan, sorry about the temper tantrum you witnessed earlier. I have a problem with jealousy, or that’s what everyone tells me… something about after effects of my parent’s divorce or some crap.”
“Well, it was very nice to meet you Miss Isabella. I’m going to let you finish making Jasper breakfast since I think the two of you should have some time to talk. If he asks about where I am, just tell him I went out to get some supplies for school and to learn the “lay of the land.” I hope we can become great friends Isabella.” Rose finished what seemed like a monologue from one of Shakespeare’s plays and places a gentle kiss on my cheek before skipping out the front door.
I stood there with the wooden spoon in my hand staring after her. This seems to be a common trait for these siblings, and I’m not sure I like it. I shook my head and went back to the task at hand, Jasper’s breakfast. I pulled the bacon and sausage out of the pan, placing them on a plate in the oven so they were still warm when Jasper was ready to eat. Picking up the bowl, I brought it over to the pan Rosalie had previously used for the bacon and poured a small amount of the pancake batter in while humming the melody to the one song I can remember Renee singing to me as a little girl.
At some point in the twenty or so minutes it took me to cook the pancakes, two things happened. One, I started to sing along with the tune playing in my head, and two, Jasper woke up. I realized Jasper was awake when his smooth tenor voice joined me on the last couple of lines.
There ain't nothing that I wouldn't do
Go to the ends of the earth for you
Make you happy, make your dreams come true
To make you feel my love
I spun around causing left over batter to spray around the kitchen and on Jasper’s toned abs, which he had left uncovered for my obvious enjoyment.
“I’m sorry if I startled you, Miss Bella, but I couldn’t help but join you and the wonderful smells wafting from the room called to me.” He said as he closed his eyes and inhaled deeply.
“Uh…” I said, still staring at the batter dripping slowly down his abs, “There are pancakes by the stove and bacon and sausage in the oven, help yourself. I’ll be right back. I forgot something in my car.” I said using my car as an excuse to leave before I was seducing him again.
I sighed as I reached my car, happy I left some of my more casual clothes in the trunk. I changed into a black pull over, black lounge pants and my favorite pair of studded black Converse before heading back upstairs where Jasper was waiting for me.
I didn’t hesitate this time; I turned the door knob and walked calmly through the doorway. Jasper was seated at the head of the table shoving the food into his mouth like it was the first time he’d had real food in a long time. I stifled a laugh, as I noticed the small pieces of pancake that were stuck in the bottom of his hair.
He turned around, fork half way to his mouth. “What…?”
“Nothing, you just look so adorable.”
“Oh, okay.” He said, shoving another forkful in his mouth.
I sat down in the chair next to him, taking in the unique and eclectic decorating style that seemed to spread from the kitchen to the rest of the house. I was caught in my musings about what could have happened that caused Jasper to leave Texas when I was pulled from my seat into Jasper’s lap.
“Can I ask you something and get an honest answer Darlin’?” he asked, sounding so serious I was certain he knew about my role in Mike’s death.
“Sure,” I said slowly, almost hesitantly.
“Why did you walk away when Rose showed up at the theater tonight, err…yesterday I guess, instead of letting me explain?” He asked running his hands nervously over his jeans.
“Because I’ve been used and forgotten too many times to let myself wait for the excuse.” I said hiding my face in my hands, moving my legs to get up and go back to having some sort of personal space for the both of us.
We sat in silence as my words hung in the air between us, the weight of them making me feel like I was drowning. “What was Texas like?” I asked in an attempt to move the focus of our conversation off of me.
“Hot…” he said, his signature smirk on his face.
“Okay captain obvious, other than hot what was it like?” I said sarcasm becoming my primary language.
“It was amazing and boring at the same time, if that makes any sense.”
“Oh yes that makes perfect sense, because you can have something be amazing and boring at the same time.” I said, bringing my chair closer to him so that our knees were touching.
It was quiet between us for a while, almost to the point where it became awkward. I couldn’t help but start to laugh, our awkwardness was that absurd.
“What are we doing?” I asked, the laughter dying down.
“I’m not sure. I’ve known you since you were ten. I don’t think we need to do the get to know you crap.” He said.
We got lost in our own little world and were befuddled when Rose came walking through the door looking ready for school.
“Um, Rhee…it’s 5 in the morning, where did you find a store that was open?” Jasper asked, seeming concerned about his sister’s possible criminal activity.
“Don’t you go worrying your pretty little head Apple Jax. All I did was go get the rest of my stuff from the car. You two were so far off in your own little bubble neither of you noticed me walk by with boxes earlier.” She said, hands on her hips and her sassy attitude rolling off her in waves.
“I should get home. Daddy’s got to be worried sick right now, and I have to get ready for school. Rose, do you want a ride to school? I could swing by and get you on my way in.” I said hoping to get to know the elusive family member.
I lied again. I’m getting really good at doing that; I guess the theater class the school had me take was good for something. Daddy asked where I was going, dressed like I was and at such a late hour. I told him Angela found a new hang out and wanted me to check it out with her. He let me go but set a curfew, and he knew I hated those. I slowly pulled into the parking lot behind a tall brick building next to the car that haunted my day dreams, so many possibilities. I pulled myself out of the daydream and began the journey to his apartment.
I stood outside of the apartment taking in the imperfections of the large 698 on the door, listening to the quiet noises as they filtered through the wood. I laughed quietly as light sound of snoring battled with the attempted quiet from the running water. I pulled my hand back and let it lightly fall against the smooth door, hoping whoever was awake didn’t hear it. I was about to turn away when the door opened and I was soundlessly invited in.
The scene before me unfolded as I was invited into the small and undecorated apartment by the blonde who had bravely faced me after my not so lady-like behavior earlier. It was obvious Jasper was dead to the world, while he slept, since he barely registered the door closing as his sister walked away too soon to attend to the bacon and sausage sizzling in the cast iron skillet on the stove. I took in more of the scene and picked up a blue and white checkered bowl before mixing in what appeared to be the rest of the ingredients for cinnamon apple pancakes. Jasper’s sister walked over after making sure we hadn’t woken him and lightly placed a well-manicured hand in my shoulder.
“I didn’t have a chance to introduce myself earlier, I’m Rosalie Hale.” She said, extending a hand out to me.
I looked at her hand and back to the bowl before putting the bowl down and shaking her hand quickly. “I’m Isabella Swan, sorry about the temper tantrum you witnessed earlier. I have a problem with jealousy, or that’s what everyone tells me… something about after effects of my parent’s divorce or some crap.”
“Well, it was very nice to meet you Miss Isabella. I’m going to let you finish making Jasper breakfast since I think the two of you should have some time to talk. If he asks about where I am, just tell him I went out to get some supplies for school and to learn the “lay of the land.” I hope we can become great friends Isabella.” Rose finished what seemed like a monologue from one of Shakespeare’s plays and places a gentle kiss on my cheek before skipping out the front door.
I stood there with the wooden spoon in my hand staring after her. This seems to be a common trait for these siblings, and I’m not sure I like it. I shook my head and went back to the task at hand, Jasper’s breakfast. I pulled the bacon and sausage out of the pan, placing them on a plate in the oven so they were still warm when Jasper was ready to eat. Picking up the bowl, I brought it over to the pan Rosalie had previously used for the bacon and poured a small amount of the pancake batter in while humming the melody to the one song I can remember Renee singing to me as a little girl.
At some point in the twenty or so minutes it took me to cook the pancakes, two things happened. One, I started to sing along with the tune playing in my head, and two, Jasper woke up. I realized Jasper was awake when his smooth tenor voice joined me on the last couple of lines.
There ain't nothing that I wouldn't do
Go to the ends of the earth for you
Make you happy, make your dreams come true
To make you feel my love
I spun around causing left over batter to spray around the kitchen and on Jasper’s toned abs, which he had left uncovered for my obvious enjoyment.
“I’m sorry if I startled you, Miss Bella, but I couldn’t help but join you and the wonderful smells wafting from the room called to me.” He said as he closed his eyes and inhaled deeply.
“Uh…” I said, still staring at the batter dripping slowly down his abs, “There are pancakes by the stove and bacon and sausage in the oven, help yourself. I’ll be right back. I forgot something in my car.” I said using my car as an excuse to leave before I was seducing him again.
I sighed as I reached my car, happy I left some of my more casual clothes in the trunk. I changed into a black pull over, black lounge pants and my favorite pair of studded black Converse before heading back upstairs where Jasper was waiting for me.
I didn’t hesitate this time; I turned the door knob and walked calmly through the doorway. Jasper was seated at the head of the table shoving the food into his mouth like it was the first time he’d had real food in a long time. I stifled a laugh, as I noticed the small pieces of pancake that were stuck in the bottom of his hair.
He turned around, fork half way to his mouth. “What…?”
“Nothing, you just look so adorable.”
“Oh, okay.” He said, shoving another forkful in his mouth.
I sat down in the chair next to him, taking in the unique and eclectic decorating style that seemed to spread from the kitchen to the rest of the house. I was caught in my musings about what could have happened that caused Jasper to leave Texas when I was pulled from my seat into Jasper’s lap.
“Can I ask you something and get an honest answer Darlin’?” he asked, sounding so serious I was certain he knew about my role in Mike’s death.
“Sure,” I said slowly, almost hesitantly.
“Why did you walk away when Rose showed up at the theater tonight, err…yesterday I guess, instead of letting me explain?” He asked running his hands nervously over his jeans.
“Because I’ve been used and forgotten too many times to let myself wait for the excuse.” I said hiding my face in my hands, moving my legs to get up and go back to having some sort of personal space for the both of us.
We sat in silence as my words hung in the air between us, the weight of them making me feel like I was drowning. “What was Texas like?” I asked in an attempt to move the focus of our conversation off of me.
“Hot…” he said, his signature smirk on his face.
“Okay captain obvious, other than hot what was it like?” I said sarcasm becoming my primary language.
“It was amazing and boring at the same time, if that makes any sense.”
“Oh yes that makes perfect sense, because you can have something be amazing and boring at the same time.” I said, bringing my chair closer to him so that our knees were touching.
It was quiet between us for a while, almost to the point where it became awkward. I couldn’t help but start to laugh, our awkwardness was that absurd.
“What are we doing?” I asked, the laughter dying down.
“I’m not sure. I’ve known you since you were ten. I don’t think we need to do the get to know you crap.” He said.
We got lost in our own little world and were befuddled when Rose came walking through the door looking ready for school.
“Um, Rhee…it’s 5 in the morning, where did you find a store that was open?” Jasper asked, seeming concerned about his sister’s possible criminal activity.
“Don’t you go worrying your pretty little head Apple Jax. All I did was go get the rest of my stuff from the car. You two were so far off in your own little bubble neither of you noticed me walk by with boxes earlier.” She said, hands on her hips and her sassy attitude rolling off her in waves.
“I should get home. Daddy’s got to be worried sick right now, and I have to get ready for school. Rose, do you want a ride to school? I could swing by and get you on my way in.” I said hoping to get to know the elusive family member.
Chapter 12: Jasper POV
I stood there listening to the door slam and the tires squeal, just staring at the road after she left like it would hold some hidden clue in its twilight shadows. But it didn’t offer me any help, just a creeping cold that told me I had pushed her again. When I turned back to my car, my shoulders slumped and my happiness of seeing Rose drained away. I was not surprised by the look my youngest sibling was giving me.
With one last pointed eye-roll, Rose walked over to where I stood and threw her arm around my waist. “Go after her you idiot. I mean, God! Didn’t you learn anything from all of the chick flicks Nettie, Lucy, and I made you watch with us growing up?” She said before pushing me toward my car.
I dug my heels into the pavement, slowing her down for the moment, “Rose, I don’t think going after her right now would be the smartest idea. She may not look tough but she knows how to handle a gun and has the best aim out of anyone on the force, and she isn’t a police officer.” I paused when I heard a rather uncharacteristic snort from my sister.
“Rough and tumble Jasper is afraid of a girl, who looks about half his age? I never thought I’d see the day when my big brother was afraid of a girl!” She exclaimed, almost rolling on the ground with laughter.
“Okay, keep laughing Rose and I’ll make you walk.” I said concentrating on getting back to my car so that I didn’t hit her.There were too many people in this parking lot that would take it out of context, since even though we were siblings, we didn’t look anything alike.
“Now is that how momma taught you to treat a lady Apple Jax?” Rose asked, as she slid gracefully into the passenger seat.
I scoffed playfully, “When did you become a lady Rhee?”
“Apple Jax, can I talk to her? Explain things, maybe. I must have ruined everything by showing up here tonight, and I feel really bad about it. I haven’t seen you this happy since, well, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you that happy.” She said, turning in her seat to face me, her baby blue eyes pleading.
“Rhee, as much as I love that you want to make things better, maybe I should consider this as fate telling me, ‘Hey moron, this isn’t meant to be.” I said as I put the small theater and Bella’s broken expression behind me.
Rose slumped against the seat, but it definitely wasn’t in defeat. I knew she was trying to find a way to make this right, and I let her, because it gave me hope that maybe I just wasn’t hearing fate correctly. It gave me hope that this broken girl was the other half of me that I had been missing. That she was the one thing I was always searching for. I pulled into my parking spot and helped Rose up the rather precarious steps before showing her around. Leaving her to settle in my room; I set up my cell phone and alarm on the coffee table before passing out on the couch, knowing tomorrow would be a long day.
My mind registered the sound of the front door opening and closing and the smell of some meat product cooking before my eyes opened and my cell phone vibrated across the table to the floor.
0o0o0
Rose POV
I waited, pretending to get settled in Jasper’s room, for Jasper to fall asleep. I know he said it wouldn’t do any good for me to meddle with the mess I created, but I had honestly never seen him this happy before. Sure, he was happy when he lived with Lucy, Nettie, Momma, and I, but his happiness always seemed forced, and now I had proof that it was. Looking around at the sparsely decorated room, a notepad sitting on the bedside table caught my eye. I smiled, knowing exactly what I was going to do with the address scribbled on the page.
I quietly eased the bedroom door open and walked right past the living room to the front door; if I got caught, I could always use the excuse of needing a drink before bed. Carefully pulling the keys out of Jasper’s pants, I got ready to find this girl’s house.
I drove slowly around town, hoping I wouldn’t get myself lost. Finally, pulling up in front of a rather intimidating two story house, I knocked on the door, pacing to keep myself from chickening out and driving back to Jasper’s. The door swung open and I found myself face to face with a delicate looking brunette. The expression on her face dropped from one of pleasant surprise to one of strong dislike, I would even venture to say it qualified as hate.
“What do you want?” She asked, leaning against the door frame with her arms crossed against her chest.
“I was hoping I could explain. I think there was a misunderstanding tonight.” I said, hoping she would be willing to hear me out.
“Fine” She said, closing the door behind her and sitting on the railing, raising an eyebrow in my direction.
“Well,” I started, testing to see how this conversation was going to go.
“Would you just explain whatever big misunderstanding there was, I have things I need to do.” She said, her shoulders tensing and her entire body telling me she was on the defensive.
“I think you misunderstood the hug between Jasper and I. You probably think we’re dating, like most people, but the honest to god truth is that we are brother and sister. I’m the reason he’s been gone for ten weeks. I’m guessing he hasn’t told you about any of us, the few who really know him that he left in Texas nine years ago. I’m sorry that I ruined your date and that I came over unannounced like this.” I turned and started to walk back to Jasper’s car, turning back to add, “Please don’t shut him out because of me. You should know I have never seen him as happy as he was tonight.”
I got into Jasper’s car, leaving Jasper’s love interest standing on her porch to contemplate what I told her. I think I just moved into a real life soap opera.
With one last pointed eye-roll, Rose walked over to where I stood and threw her arm around my waist. “Go after her you idiot. I mean, God! Didn’t you learn anything from all of the chick flicks Nettie, Lucy, and I made you watch with us growing up?” She said before pushing me toward my car.
I dug my heels into the pavement, slowing her down for the moment, “Rose, I don’t think going after her right now would be the smartest idea. She may not look tough but she knows how to handle a gun and has the best aim out of anyone on the force, and she isn’t a police officer.” I paused when I heard a rather uncharacteristic snort from my sister.
“Rough and tumble Jasper is afraid of a girl, who looks about half his age? I never thought I’d see the day when my big brother was afraid of a girl!” She exclaimed, almost rolling on the ground with laughter.
“Okay, keep laughing Rose and I’ll make you walk.” I said concentrating on getting back to my car so that I didn’t hit her.There were too many people in this parking lot that would take it out of context, since even though we were siblings, we didn’t look anything alike.
“Now is that how momma taught you to treat a lady Apple Jax?” Rose asked, as she slid gracefully into the passenger seat.
I scoffed playfully, “When did you become a lady Rhee?”
“Apple Jax, can I talk to her? Explain things, maybe. I must have ruined everything by showing up here tonight, and I feel really bad about it. I haven’t seen you this happy since, well, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you that happy.” She said, turning in her seat to face me, her baby blue eyes pleading.
“Rhee, as much as I love that you want to make things better, maybe I should consider this as fate telling me, ‘Hey moron, this isn’t meant to be.” I said as I put the small theater and Bella’s broken expression behind me.
Rose slumped against the seat, but it definitely wasn’t in defeat. I knew she was trying to find a way to make this right, and I let her, because it gave me hope that maybe I just wasn’t hearing fate correctly. It gave me hope that this broken girl was the other half of me that I had been missing. That she was the one thing I was always searching for. I pulled into my parking spot and helped Rose up the rather precarious steps before showing her around. Leaving her to settle in my room; I set up my cell phone and alarm on the coffee table before passing out on the couch, knowing tomorrow would be a long day.
My mind registered the sound of the front door opening and closing and the smell of some meat product cooking before my eyes opened and my cell phone vibrated across the table to the floor.
0o0o0
Rose POV
I waited, pretending to get settled in Jasper’s room, for Jasper to fall asleep. I know he said it wouldn’t do any good for me to meddle with the mess I created, but I had honestly never seen him this happy before. Sure, he was happy when he lived with Lucy, Nettie, Momma, and I, but his happiness always seemed forced, and now I had proof that it was. Looking around at the sparsely decorated room, a notepad sitting on the bedside table caught my eye. I smiled, knowing exactly what I was going to do with the address scribbled on the page.
I quietly eased the bedroom door open and walked right past the living room to the front door; if I got caught, I could always use the excuse of needing a drink before bed. Carefully pulling the keys out of Jasper’s pants, I got ready to find this girl’s house.
I drove slowly around town, hoping I wouldn’t get myself lost. Finally, pulling up in front of a rather intimidating two story house, I knocked on the door, pacing to keep myself from chickening out and driving back to Jasper’s. The door swung open and I found myself face to face with a delicate looking brunette. The expression on her face dropped from one of pleasant surprise to one of strong dislike, I would even venture to say it qualified as hate.
“What do you want?” She asked, leaning against the door frame with her arms crossed against her chest.
“I was hoping I could explain. I think there was a misunderstanding tonight.” I said, hoping she would be willing to hear me out.
“Fine” She said, closing the door behind her and sitting on the railing, raising an eyebrow in my direction.
“Well,” I started, testing to see how this conversation was going to go.
“Would you just explain whatever big misunderstanding there was, I have things I need to do.” She said, her shoulders tensing and her entire body telling me she was on the defensive.
“I think you misunderstood the hug between Jasper and I. You probably think we’re dating, like most people, but the honest to god truth is that we are brother and sister. I’m the reason he’s been gone for ten weeks. I’m guessing he hasn’t told you about any of us, the few who really know him that he left in Texas nine years ago. I’m sorry that I ruined your date and that I came over unannounced like this.” I turned and started to walk back to Jasper’s car, turning back to add, “Please don’t shut him out because of me. You should know I have never seen him as happy as he was tonight.”
I got into Jasper’s car, leaving Jasper’s love interest standing on her porch to contemplate what I told her. I think I just moved into a real life soap opera.
Chapter 11: Bella POV
Ten fucking weeks! That’s exactly how long it’s been since I’ve seen Detective Whitlock. This was too easy, and Dad hasn’t said anything about Jasper being pulled off the case so I know that isn’t why he hasn’t been around… What if he thinks I’m guilty and that’s why he’s been avoiding me?
I stood, leaning against the side of my emerald green Porsche contemplating the mysterious disappearance of Jasper Whitlock, playing innocently with the tie that held my make shift shirt closed, enjoying the reactions of the idiotic teenage boys around me. I let my mind wander to thoughts of anything other than the crime I seemingly pulled off, or the hot detective in charge of the investigation of it. I jumped, causing my feet to slide slightly in Jasper’s boots, as I felt rough fingertips gliding across the small of my back, just above the waist of my black mini skirt. I looked over my shoulder, and gazed into the hazel green eyes that I had missed over the last weeks.
“Jasper!” I exclaimed as I threw my arms around his neck with enough force to cause him to take a step backwards.
I could feel his chest rumble as he laughed. “Well, hello to you to Miss Bella.” He said, spinning me around before putting me back on solid ground.
I notice a small smirk growing on his face as he looked me over, his eyes resting on the boots I have yet to return. “So that’s where my boots disappeared to. I tossed my apartment looking for them before I left.”
“I hope you don’t mind, I found them under my bed after you left and they just look so good on me.” I said, focusing my eyesight on the scuffs of his worn boots.
I continue to stare at the ground, trying to dig a hole through the tar parking lot, until his dry fingers connect with my chin, lifting my eyes to meet his. “Darlin’ don’t worry about it; they were in your room. I’m just glad I didn’t lose them at the club or somewhere along the way.”
I took a step back, putting space between the two of us, staring at him coolly. I was not about to let him charm me into forgetting about the fact he disappeared for ten weeks. “Where have you been?” I asked, with more attitude than I intended.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I was leaving. Honestly, I didn’t think it was any of your business, and I still don’t think you need to know.” He snapped back at me.
My eyes focused back on the ground and I pulled my bottom lip between my teeth, willing the tears that were building behind my eyes, not to fall. “I’m sorry,” I whispered, “I shouldn’t have asked, and you’re right, it’s none of my business. I should go. Good day, Detective Whitlock.”
I got into my car, slamming the door and throwing it into gear, driving off in the general direction of my house. As I drove to Angela’s, I thought about my recent confrontation with the sexy and dangerous Mr. Whitlock. I sat in Angela’s driveway for an unknown amount of time, lost in my thoughts until Mr. Weber tapped on the window smiling. After apologizing for loitering in his driveway, I made my way home, in a more confident mood than when I arrived.
I parked my car, stopping to pet the neighborhood’s stray cat before making my way inside and starting on my homework. I was half way through the assigned reading for my senior literature class when there was a timid knock on my door. I slowly walked over to the door, adding more scuffs to the already distressed boots still on my feet. I gasped when I pulled back the curtain in the side window and saw the one person I never expected to see again in a million years, Jasper.
I opened the door, forcing myself to look uninterested in his sudden appearance. “Hello Detective Whitlock, is there something I can help you with?” I asked, leaning against the door frame.
His head snapped up, like he didn’t realize that I had opened the door. “Miss Bella… I wanted to apologize for my sharp words earlier this afternoon. They were uncalled for, and I am truly sorry if I hurt your feelings or offended you. I want to make it up to you, if you’ll let me.” He said pausing, almost like he was trying to gauge my mood or reaction.
When I didn’t close the door in his face, his face lit up with that trademark smirk as he said, “I would like to take you out tonight. I was thinking that since the local theater is doing an interactive performance of The Rocky Horror Picture show, and Halloween is in a couple of days that it would be something fun for us to do together.”
I obviously reacted because he gave me directions to the theater and a polite kiss on the cheek before getting into his fuckhawt car and driving off. I walked off toward my room in a daze, pulling up Google to figure out what was actually going to happen on our “date” tonight. After finding a description of one the characters and printing out an audience participation script, I went to my mother’s closet to pull out everything I would need. I found a suitable black satin mini dress with cap sleeves, and borrowed an apron from one of the housekeepers we employed.
When I was dressed and make up was applied, I sectioned my mahogany hair while the curling iron heated up. I turned up my go-to playlist as Aerosmith’s Dude (Looks Like a Lady) came on, belting along with Steven Tyler. After teasing, curling, and adding half a can of hairspray to my hair, I grabbed my iPod and the black lace up boots I borrowed from Alice ages ago, before heading to my car and toward the theater. Jasper was waiting for me outside dressed in a white button down, open in the front to reveal the tattoo I longed to lick, a black waistcoat, complete with tails, and a pair of black dress pants. His honey blond hair was hidden by a bald wig with greasy blond hair attached in a sparse fashion. After my car was parked, we joined the throng of people heading into the theater and found seats. I thanked Jasper quietly when he handed me a bag with all the props I would need, and I reached into my purse for the script I had printed earlier.
0o0o0
The first few musical numbers passed with Jasper showing me what to throw and what to say. He had the patience of a saint. I had caught on enough that I attempted to participate during the one scene I had seen before, the Time Warp. As the beginning of the song came on, the actors come out on to the stage mimicking the video while the audience stood. I was surprised when
Jasper got completely involved with the scene, including singing along.
It’s astounding, time is fleeting. Madness, takes its toll, but listen closely...
I smiled, singing the next line,
Not for very much longer
I barely registered the rest of the audience as Jasper and I continued singing back and forth to each other. He continued to smile and sing while doing the Time Warp, whereas I had a hard time keeping myself from laughing.
I finally got it together enough to sing,
It’s so dreamy. Oh, fantasy free me! So you can’t see me, no not at all. In another dimension, with voyeuristic intentions. Where secluded, I see all.
We watched as the song came to an end and Janet tried to convince Brad to leave, rather unsuccessfully, and then Jasper froze mid comment and stared at the stage. When I followed his line of sight, I swear I felt my jaw hit the floor. Standing there on the stage in the ridiculous wig, fishnets and corset was Peter. Our need to laugh overthrew our shock when Peter began to sing.
How do you do, I see you’ve met my faithful handyman. He’s just a little brought down, because when you knocked, he thought you were the Candy Man. Don’t get strung out by the way I look, don’t judge a book by its cover. I’m not much of a man by day, but by night I’m one hell of a lover. I’m just a sweet Transvestite from Transylvania. Let me show you around, maybe play you a sound. You look like you’re both pretty groovy. Or if you want something visual, that’s not too abysmal, we could take in an old Steve Reeves’ movie.
Peter sang out with confidence as the scene played out behind him.
The rest of the show went without a hitch and we decided to get ice cream at The Creole Creamery. We walked to his car so he could lock it up before joining me for the short drive to the ice cream parlor. Leaning against his car was a tall, blonde with a model’s body. When she saw us approach, she uncrossed her legs and adjusted the pale purple suit skirt she was wearing before practically tackling Jasper. I stood on the outside of this obvious reunion, trying not to become obnoxious and bitchy. It wasn’t working. I huffed, crossing my arms over my chest and turned on my heel, deciding that he could go get his own fucking ice cream with the blonde he obviously knew very well. I was halfway to my car when there was a swift tug at my wrist, causing me to pivot on one pointy stiletto.
“What do you want Jasper? To throw my poor judgment back in my face? If that is the case, then fuck you, I’m done. Good night Mr. Whitlock.” I stormed off closing the rest of the gap between me and my car, stomping my feet like a two year old who didn’t get their way.
When I got home, Charlie gave me the look, you know the one parents give that says ‘where have you been and why are you slamming my door?’ I walked right past him, and even contemplated flipping him off when he followed me up the stairs and to my bedroom door. Instead, I chose to slam the door in his face and blast whatever loud rock song came on my iPod.
I stood, leaning against the side of my emerald green Porsche contemplating the mysterious disappearance of Jasper Whitlock, playing innocently with the tie that held my make shift shirt closed, enjoying the reactions of the idiotic teenage boys around me. I let my mind wander to thoughts of anything other than the crime I seemingly pulled off, or the hot detective in charge of the investigation of it. I jumped, causing my feet to slide slightly in Jasper’s boots, as I felt rough fingertips gliding across the small of my back, just above the waist of my black mini skirt. I looked over my shoulder, and gazed into the hazel green eyes that I had missed over the last weeks.
“Jasper!” I exclaimed as I threw my arms around his neck with enough force to cause him to take a step backwards.
I could feel his chest rumble as he laughed. “Well, hello to you to Miss Bella.” He said, spinning me around before putting me back on solid ground.
I notice a small smirk growing on his face as he looked me over, his eyes resting on the boots I have yet to return. “So that’s where my boots disappeared to. I tossed my apartment looking for them before I left.”
“I hope you don’t mind, I found them under my bed after you left and they just look so good on me.” I said, focusing my eyesight on the scuffs of his worn boots.
I continue to stare at the ground, trying to dig a hole through the tar parking lot, until his dry fingers connect with my chin, lifting my eyes to meet his. “Darlin’ don’t worry about it; they were in your room. I’m just glad I didn’t lose them at the club or somewhere along the way.”
I took a step back, putting space between the two of us, staring at him coolly. I was not about to let him charm me into forgetting about the fact he disappeared for ten weeks. “Where have you been?” I asked, with more attitude than I intended.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I was leaving. Honestly, I didn’t think it was any of your business, and I still don’t think you need to know.” He snapped back at me.
My eyes focused back on the ground and I pulled my bottom lip between my teeth, willing the tears that were building behind my eyes, not to fall. “I’m sorry,” I whispered, “I shouldn’t have asked, and you’re right, it’s none of my business. I should go. Good day, Detective Whitlock.”
I got into my car, slamming the door and throwing it into gear, driving off in the general direction of my house. As I drove to Angela’s, I thought about my recent confrontation with the sexy and dangerous Mr. Whitlock. I sat in Angela’s driveway for an unknown amount of time, lost in my thoughts until Mr. Weber tapped on the window smiling. After apologizing for loitering in his driveway, I made my way home, in a more confident mood than when I arrived.
I parked my car, stopping to pet the neighborhood’s stray cat before making my way inside and starting on my homework. I was half way through the assigned reading for my senior literature class when there was a timid knock on my door. I slowly walked over to the door, adding more scuffs to the already distressed boots still on my feet. I gasped when I pulled back the curtain in the side window and saw the one person I never expected to see again in a million years, Jasper.
I opened the door, forcing myself to look uninterested in his sudden appearance. “Hello Detective Whitlock, is there something I can help you with?” I asked, leaning against the door frame.
His head snapped up, like he didn’t realize that I had opened the door. “Miss Bella… I wanted to apologize for my sharp words earlier this afternoon. They were uncalled for, and I am truly sorry if I hurt your feelings or offended you. I want to make it up to you, if you’ll let me.” He said pausing, almost like he was trying to gauge my mood or reaction.
When I didn’t close the door in his face, his face lit up with that trademark smirk as he said, “I would like to take you out tonight. I was thinking that since the local theater is doing an interactive performance of The Rocky Horror Picture show, and Halloween is in a couple of days that it would be something fun for us to do together.”
I obviously reacted because he gave me directions to the theater and a polite kiss on the cheek before getting into his fuckhawt car and driving off. I walked off toward my room in a daze, pulling up Google to figure out what was actually going to happen on our “date” tonight. After finding a description of one the characters and printing out an audience participation script, I went to my mother’s closet to pull out everything I would need. I found a suitable black satin mini dress with cap sleeves, and borrowed an apron from one of the housekeepers we employed.
When I was dressed and make up was applied, I sectioned my mahogany hair while the curling iron heated up. I turned up my go-to playlist as Aerosmith’s Dude (Looks Like a Lady) came on, belting along with Steven Tyler. After teasing, curling, and adding half a can of hairspray to my hair, I grabbed my iPod and the black lace up boots I borrowed from Alice ages ago, before heading to my car and toward the theater. Jasper was waiting for me outside dressed in a white button down, open in the front to reveal the tattoo I longed to lick, a black waistcoat, complete with tails, and a pair of black dress pants. His honey blond hair was hidden by a bald wig with greasy blond hair attached in a sparse fashion. After my car was parked, we joined the throng of people heading into the theater and found seats. I thanked Jasper quietly when he handed me a bag with all the props I would need, and I reached into my purse for the script I had printed earlier.
0o0o0
The first few musical numbers passed with Jasper showing me what to throw and what to say. He had the patience of a saint. I had caught on enough that I attempted to participate during the one scene I had seen before, the Time Warp. As the beginning of the song came on, the actors come out on to the stage mimicking the video while the audience stood. I was surprised when
Jasper got completely involved with the scene, including singing along.
It’s astounding, time is fleeting. Madness, takes its toll, but listen closely...
I smiled, singing the next line,
Not for very much longer
I barely registered the rest of the audience as Jasper and I continued singing back and forth to each other. He continued to smile and sing while doing the Time Warp, whereas I had a hard time keeping myself from laughing.
I finally got it together enough to sing,
It’s so dreamy. Oh, fantasy free me! So you can’t see me, no not at all. In another dimension, with voyeuristic intentions. Where secluded, I see all.
We watched as the song came to an end and Janet tried to convince Brad to leave, rather unsuccessfully, and then Jasper froze mid comment and stared at the stage. When I followed his line of sight, I swear I felt my jaw hit the floor. Standing there on the stage in the ridiculous wig, fishnets and corset was Peter. Our need to laugh overthrew our shock when Peter began to sing.
How do you do, I see you’ve met my faithful handyman. He’s just a little brought down, because when you knocked, he thought you were the Candy Man. Don’t get strung out by the way I look, don’t judge a book by its cover. I’m not much of a man by day, but by night I’m one hell of a lover. I’m just a sweet Transvestite from Transylvania. Let me show you around, maybe play you a sound. You look like you’re both pretty groovy. Or if you want something visual, that’s not too abysmal, we could take in an old Steve Reeves’ movie.
Peter sang out with confidence as the scene played out behind him.
The rest of the show went without a hitch and we decided to get ice cream at The Creole Creamery. We walked to his car so he could lock it up before joining me for the short drive to the ice cream parlor. Leaning against his car was a tall, blonde with a model’s body. When she saw us approach, she uncrossed her legs and adjusted the pale purple suit skirt she was wearing before practically tackling Jasper. I stood on the outside of this obvious reunion, trying not to become obnoxious and bitchy. It wasn’t working. I huffed, crossing my arms over my chest and turned on my heel, deciding that he could go get his own fucking ice cream with the blonde he obviously knew very well. I was halfway to my car when there was a swift tug at my wrist, causing me to pivot on one pointy stiletto.
“What do you want Jasper? To throw my poor judgment back in my face? If that is the case, then fuck you, I’m done. Good night Mr. Whitlock.” I stormed off closing the rest of the gap between me and my car, stomping my feet like a two year old who didn’t get their way.
When I got home, Charlie gave me the look, you know the one parents give that says ‘where have you been and why are you slamming my door?’ I walked right past him, and even contemplated flipping him off when he followed me up the stairs and to my bedroom door. Instead, I chose to slam the door in his face and blast whatever loud rock song came on my iPod.
Chapter 10: Jasper POV
I sat in the drive way, banging my head against the steering wheel. My mother would surely kick my ass if she could see me now. I walked out on a lady. Granted, we were in a possibly compromising situation since she is the boss’ daughter, but I was taught to never walk out on someone.
As I turned the ignition on the car, Saving Abel’s Sailed Away drifted through the speakers. Pulling away from the Swan residence, I briefly wondered what Miss Bella would tell her father when he asked why my car was still sitting in their driveway.. Turning back toward town, I began to sing along as I thought about everything I had ruined and given up when I moved to pursue my dreams.
“Does it hurt to hear me say, that I never really meant to stay, I left you right where I want you.” I sang, remembering the hurt on my mother’s face when I told her I refused to play into her high society game.
That was the day I realized that my mother didn’t love me for the attentive son I was. She wanted to better the family name after she forced it to be synonymous with scandal and improper behavior. First, she wanted me to marry Maria. Then, she hoped it would be Charlotte. When I failed to get either girl to agree to marry me, my mother continued down the debutant list, each girl getting younger than the last. I finally had enough my senior year and told her I was moving to New Orleans to become a cop. She disowned me, cutting off any connection I had to my family and friends.
No one wanted to talk to the poor boy, so I stuck my head into my books and graduated early with honors and at the top of my class. I packed up my childhood room, while my mother watched, tight lipped from the doorway. I knew she wanted to say something, most likely a snide remark or bitchy comment about my apparent abandonment of her and my younger sisters, Lucy, Nettie and Rose.
She had done the same guilt trip to Emmett and Eric when they left for school. It had them reconsidering their decisions; however, it wouldn’t work for me. She couldn’t give me anything that would make me give up my dream to save hers. My father had always told me it was our job to stand up for those who couldn’t do that for themselves, so that was exactly what I was going to do.
I put the car into gear as my memory and the song came to an end, listening to the engine purr before slowly making my way out of the quiet outskirts and back toward the loud center where my apartment was, taking solace in the hustle and bustle of the city. I walked into my apartment, sighing when I noticed the pale pink envelope sitting on my counter with Rose’s delicate script decorating the front. I put my keys down next to it, turning it over a couple of times before setting it down and pouring myself a glass of Jameson. I knew eventually I would have to open that letter, even though I already had an idea as to what it contained. Rose wasn’t one to be ignored.
Rose was the youngest out of the six of us, which allowed her to get away with anything, but also meant that most days she was fighting for attention. Over the years, she had mastered the art of getting attention without having to say a word, and now, everyone of her siblings knew better than to ignore her. Finishing my drink I opened the envelope, quickly reading what was on the page before calling Peter and packing what I would need into my car.
As I turned the ignition on the car, Saving Abel’s Sailed Away drifted through the speakers. Pulling away from the Swan residence, I briefly wondered what Miss Bella would tell her father when he asked why my car was still sitting in their driveway.. Turning back toward town, I began to sing along as I thought about everything I had ruined and given up when I moved to pursue my dreams.
“Does it hurt to hear me say, that I never really meant to stay, I left you right where I want you.” I sang, remembering the hurt on my mother’s face when I told her I refused to play into her high society game.
That was the day I realized that my mother didn’t love me for the attentive son I was. She wanted to better the family name after she forced it to be synonymous with scandal and improper behavior. First, she wanted me to marry Maria. Then, she hoped it would be Charlotte. When I failed to get either girl to agree to marry me, my mother continued down the debutant list, each girl getting younger than the last. I finally had enough my senior year and told her I was moving to New Orleans to become a cop. She disowned me, cutting off any connection I had to my family and friends.
No one wanted to talk to the poor boy, so I stuck my head into my books and graduated early with honors and at the top of my class. I packed up my childhood room, while my mother watched, tight lipped from the doorway. I knew she wanted to say something, most likely a snide remark or bitchy comment about my apparent abandonment of her and my younger sisters, Lucy, Nettie and Rose.
She had done the same guilt trip to Emmett and Eric when they left for school. It had them reconsidering their decisions; however, it wouldn’t work for me. She couldn’t give me anything that would make me give up my dream to save hers. My father had always told me it was our job to stand up for those who couldn’t do that for themselves, so that was exactly what I was going to do.
I put the car into gear as my memory and the song came to an end, listening to the engine purr before slowly making my way out of the quiet outskirts and back toward the loud center where my apartment was, taking solace in the hustle and bustle of the city. I walked into my apartment, sighing when I noticed the pale pink envelope sitting on my counter with Rose’s delicate script decorating the front. I put my keys down next to it, turning it over a couple of times before setting it down and pouring myself a glass of Jameson. I knew eventually I would have to open that letter, even though I already had an idea as to what it contained. Rose wasn’t one to be ignored.
Rose was the youngest out of the six of us, which allowed her to get away with anything, but also meant that most days she was fighting for attention. Over the years, she had mastered the art of getting attention without having to say a word, and now, everyone of her siblings knew better than to ignore her. Finishing my drink I opened the envelope, quickly reading what was on the page before calling Peter and packing what I would need into my car.
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